Fuck You.
I just watched ‘Date Movie’ and cannot even begin to describe to you the horrific ness that this movie was. It was bad. It was worse than bad, it was …imagine going to a farm, and having to retrieve something from inside a cows anus using only your mouth. That’s what it was like to watch this movie. Or, or receiving anal sex from a Sperm Whale, or listening to Pauly Shore do stand up. Here are some real reviews:
"It's terrible. It's awful. It's terawful." - Pete Croatto
“it basically dares you not to run out of the theater screaming." - Steve Rhodes
"They manage to miss just about every target." - Robert Denerstein
"Date Movie is stupefyingly unfunny" - Joe Leyden
"Calling it ghastly would be an act of kindness" - Frank Swietek
“it just ain't that funny." - E! Online
"torturously unfunny and thoroughly aggravating... the year is still young, but don't be surprised if 'Date Movie' is the worst film of 2006." - James Sanford
Date Movie was bad. Seriously, do not see it. I am doing my part as a humanitarian and ensuring my place in heaven by telling you to not see this movie. It’s not funny, it’s not romantic, it’s not touching, it‘s not good. Holy shit this thing was bad. Seriously, just terrible. I’m getting angry thinking about it. This is an illustration of me during the funniest part of the movie:
I then demanded a refund, burned down an orphanage, and threw a child into the sun. This film advertises itself as having 2 of the 5 writers from ‘Scary Movie,’ clearly it was one of the writer’s retarded cousins, and the token black writer who has no clue how to write a movie, but is on board so they can make racial jokes. The following is a list of things funnier than ‘Date Movie’:-Abortions
-Rob Schneider
-Hobo Fights
-Feminism
-Chlamydia
-The Holocaust
The only thing that pissed me off more than the terrible-ness of this film, was that stupid girl a few rows below me who kept laughing. This is just proof that attractive females are stupid. Ladies, if you thought ‘Date Movie’ was funny then I recommend becoming a lesbian, because at least then you’ll have something to offer the world.
If you were planning on seeing this movie, here’s a much more entertaining way of spending your money:
Step 1: Find a homeless person and offer him/her the money
Step 2: Tear the $10 bill into 8 pieces
Step 3: Light the money on fire
Step 4: Laugh
There, you have my advice, don’t see this piece of crap. The rest is in your hands. Goodnight, and good luck.
